Site Network: Submissive Guide | Submissive Journal Prompts | Dominant Guide | Kinky Blogging | My Blog |

Essay Collection

Hundreds of the most informative essays have been hand-picked for depth of knowledge and varied opinions with new and seasoned practitioners in mind. A wide range of topics are available for you to explore. Donations are always open so submit your essay to The Iron Gate for consideration!

Email to a Friend    Print Essay    Save to Computer

Wannabe Infestation

Author: Norische

Filed in: newbies, general knowledge



wan·na·be also wan·na·bee P Pronunciation Key (wn-b, wôn-) Informal
n.
One who aspires to a role or position.
One who imitates the behavior, customs, or dress of an admired person or group.
A product designed to imitate the qualities or characteristics of something.
adj.
Wishing or aspiring to be; would-be.
[Alteration of want to be.]

The wannabee infestation that has hit the BDSM realm has risen to epidemic amounts.

Wannabees have been found in every geographic location; unfortunately, no nationality is safe.

The age range varies from time to time but it normally stays consistently between 18 and 99 years of age, there have been reports of pre-maturity wannabees throughout the larger metropolitan areas. There have also been reports of alter age wannabees; these wannabees acclimate themselves as an age outside their current realistic age grouping. For example… a 17-year-old wannabee may impersonate the activities and existence of a 21-year-old wannabee, or a 35-year-old wannabee may impersonate the activities and existence of an 8-month- old wannabee.

The genders are slightly expansive, and their flexibility is unique in this area. The standard genders are of course male and female, with the wannabee there are also gender neutral, bi-gender, transgender, cross gender, and intra-gender. A wannabee can alter his or her own natural gender to satisfy their surroundings and or requirements at the time. Procreation is not a necessity or in many cases not desired so the illusion of a specific gender is quite flexible to the situation.

Financial security is another area that wannabees have a wide range of experience and existence, from the trailer trash version to the penthouse version; all forms of financial prevalence are possible.

The social arena is the final area we shall explore, and I will go into a little more detail here since the forms of wannabees tend to break off and become subgroups once they begin to focus on their social standing.

The first subgroup is the Dom/Domme wannabee. The general characteristics of this form are control issues, self esteem issues, financial issues, sexual frustration, and moral issues. Control issues… the wannabees in this subgroup tends to cloud the line between control freak and dominant, unfortunately they have quite a bit of experience in the area of manipulation and coercion hence they may go to the extreme of abusive and not go too far outside this subgroup. Self esteem issues…a wannabee is an expert at tearing others down to make him or herself feel better or more elite, this ability is merely present to allow them to have a minimal amount of self esteem…unfortunately it rarely maintains is durability for more than a day or two and the wannabee Dom/Domme must again seek to feed his or her self esteem again. Financial issues…rarely is there a wannabee in this category that does not have some issues in this arena. The most common issue is lack of financial security while presenting the illusion of financial independence, the wannabee will boast about material items and property all the while demanding a financial contribution from his or her partners. Be leery of a wannabee in this subgroup, they tend to use their natural camouflage to hide quite well, they will demand obedience and respect and rise defensively if cornered with a difficult question. Their lack of knowledge is often turned around on their prey and manipulated to the point that the prey feels ignorant and disrespectful.

The second subgroup is the submissive wannabee. These wannabees use a wide variety of titles or labels to describe their level of devotion to the wannabee realm. Subbie, Sub, and Slave are the three that are most common although others do arise from time to time.

A "subbie" wannabee is a low level reference, to most individuals outside the wannabee realm the title itself is a dead give away to their true nature. A subbie wannabee is seen as a submissive that does not take the chosen role as seriously as others within the category, perhaps viewed as the amateur or beginner wannabee. Most subbies wish to be taken care of by their chosen focus individual. They frequently wish to have a parent figure as a partner or wish to play a role in which there is a lower level of responsibility required like that of an infant or child. In this manner they can avoid the inconveniences of duties and expectations and they always have the innocence of age to fall back on. The "pampered pet" will also fall into the "subbie" area, although they may be found in other subcategories as well.

The second label is the "sub" or "submissive" wannabee. These individuals will vary a great deal in devotion and ability; they will range from the "player sub" all the way up the hardcore "do me sub". The player sub is a temporary role only, this individual is quite serious about his or her role as a sub, unfortunately the role itself is short lasted. Normally this role will last just long enough for the submissive to get his or her desired action or reaction, whether it is a scene or playtime or an item. Once the desired effect is achieved the submissive exits the role and will for all purposes appear to be almost vanilla in nature. The "Do Me Sub" wannabee is a demanding little inconvenience. Their one and only concern is what you will do for or too him or her. Service and obedience are only used as a last resort and if it is not absolutely necessary they will avoid such actions at all cost. If they are not begging their partner to do something to them then they are begging to know what their partner would do. These individuals are easy to spot, upon first conversation they will ask "what would you do to me", "will you keep me naked", "will you punish me when I am bad", "will you share me with others"…these and similar questions are the most frequent lines of their dialogue. They do not wish to know what will be their duties or how they can serve their partner, their focus is always on themselves so what the chosen partner wishes is irrelevant with the exception of the pursuit of a fantasy.

The "slave" wannabee is a devout wannabee and undoubtedly the hardest to detect. This is a wannabee that has spent hours if not weeks or even months honing their skills as a wannabee. They have grown in the ranks of wannabee to be considered an experienced and focused individual. This wannabee is often mistaken for a true slave, but there are a few specifics that can be observed if an individual is meticulous and extreme in details. For example this individual will tent to pursue multiple partners, in other words while he or she is with one partner the "slave" wannabee will already be in pursuit of their next partner. They view this as a wise action since they do not take their role seriously they assume that their partner also views their position as a "temporary" stay. Their idea of loyalty is based on a day-to-day experience. They will remain loyal to their partner as long as their partner is the most palatable prey available, once a more influential or appealing prey is presented they will relocate and their loyalties will follow with ease. Another characteristic of this form of wannabee is that they have honed their skills as an expert manipulator; this is the skill that they survive on and to an untrained eye it is quite hidden. With a skilled slave wannabee their partner can be manipulated as easily as a puppeteer and a marionette. Only those individuals outside the relationship are keen to the level of manipulation present. Unfortunately for the wannabee's partner, he or she tends to ignore the comments or suggestions of others in fear of looking ignorant or foolish, and they tend to end up being even more devoted to their puppeteer. The strings become bonded with steel and the partner may go to the extremes of isolating itself from outside influences and disassociation with those that threaten the security of the wannabee. Without realizing it the puppet makes the perfect Dom/Domme wannabee.

Now that the different forms of wannabees have been covered, I will attempt to discuss extermination methods. Once an infestation is in progress the wannabee already has done some degree of damage, the level of damage depends on the time of exposure and the level of maturity of the wannabee. The infestation may be short lived due to the lack of appropriate stimulation to maintain the wannabees attention. Or when the level of stimulation is higher the infestation may be maintained for an extended duration, unfortunately. In such circumstances the level of damage will depend on the financial, emotional and psychological security of the individuals involved prior to the infestation. A single wannabee can financially ruin even a secure prey with even a minute about of exposure. A mature wannabee can diminish the securities of a household within a few days, since they are quite experienced and know exactly how to succeed at their end goal.

To exterminate a wannabee infestation all individuals involved must wish the infestation to be exterminated. This is not something that can be done when someone is unsure of their desire to rid their residence of such influences. Re-infestation is extremely high, and unless an individual is serious about ridding him or her self of such influences he or she will find themselves easy prey for repetitive infestations.

Awareness of an infestation is the first cut to ridding oneself of their existence. Many will deny the existence of an infestation, and allow the infestation to remain in existence for an extended period of time even though he or she is not pleased with the infestation. An existence of an unpleasant partner is frequently viewed as more appealing than the threat of no partner at all.

The second cut begins when the infested party makes the educated decision to rid him or her self of the infestation. This step takes time and consideration, most of the time the individual will try to do anything to alter the behavior of the wannabee, attempting to change the true nature of the wannabee to that which was originally sought by the individual involved. Punishment, treats, education or training, time and effort will be spent in an effort to avoid the truth….one is indeed infested with a wannabee.

The third and final cut is applied when the infested party draws the line, and applies the necessary boundaries that make the wannabee's existence less palatable. A little financial disillusion goes a long way to ridding oneself of a wannabee infestation. When the financial security is no longer present the level of desire to remain drops exponentially.

Awareness….33%
Acknowledgement….27%
Boundaries….16%
Rules….13%
Expectations….11% (do not dilute)

With this formula an infestation should easily be exterminated and even avoided to begin with. The best method of extermination is always to avoid initial infestation. Once an infestation has occurred the best method to avoid re-infestation is to remain vigilant and continue to use the above mandate at all times.

As with everything this is my opinion, take what you will and leave the rest. If you wish to contact me, my email address is Norisch1@mchsi.com. If you wish to see more of my work you may find a complete listing of all my writings at…. http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Norisches_Quill/ in the files section.

Related Essays



Mistress160ís Abode

Iron Gate Banner Exchange