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Essay Collection

Hundreds of the most informative essays have been hand-picked for depth of knowledge and varied opinions with new and seasoned practitioners in mind. A wide range of topics are available for you to explore. Donations are always open so submit your essay to The Iron Gate for consideration!


Essays Tagged: Lifestyle



Red Flags, Warning Signs, and Intuition: Learning to Trust You Instincts - Part One: Dominants by Norische
Filed in: newbies, lifestyle, dangers

Within this lifestyle there are unfortunately many dangers, there are people out there using the BDSM lifestyle as a way to abuse or use individuals under an umbrella of acceptance. Within each situat[...]

Red Flags, Warning Signs, and Intuition: Learning to Trust You Instincts- Part 2: Submissives/Slaves by Norische
Filed in: newbies, lifestyle, dangers

The BDSM lifestyle harbors many dangers, oddly enough most people think only about the dangers to the submissive or slave and not to those dangers present for the Dominant. Among the thousands of dedi[...]

Just Wait Till Your Father Gets Home: Telling Your Family by Norische
Filed in: leather, lifestyle, outting

“So what are you, some kind of Satanist, or what?” This was one of the first things my sister said when she walked into my house. It had been almost a year since I had seen my sister, she[...]

Our Absolute Lifestyle by Master Eso
Filed in: leather, lifestyle, scene

When I came out in the BDSM scene some 6 years ago, after practicing my lifestyle in the privacy of my own home for some 23 years, I did so under the naïve assumption that the B[...]

Coming out of the Closet by dark whisper
Filed in: leather, lifestyle, outting, family

I recently found myself in the unique position of having to try to "explain" dominance and submission. One afternoon, out of the blue, I wrote to my sister and told her not only that I was a[...]

Defining the BDSM Lifestyle: The Essential Prerequisite by Polly Peachum and Jon Jacobs
Filed in: dominance, submission, lifestyle, sm, definitions, bdsm, essentials

The following talks were given by Jon and Polly to a diverse audience on the IRC channel #surrender_discuss on October 8, 1996. Polly and Jon were asked to speak on the subject "Defining the BDSM[...]

Defining the BDSM Lifestyle: The Essential Prerequisite, part 2 by Polly Peachum and Jon Jacobs
Filed in: dominance, submission, lifestyle, sm, definitions, bdsm, essentials

Jon's Speech Hi, there! Polly has said the bulk of what we want to talk about tonight, but I do have a bit to add. I want to talk some about t[...]