Orgasm Control
Author: gina
Filed in: orgasm control, denial, training, submissive training
My Master and i practice Orgasm Control which is also known as Release Training. It is NOT the same thing as Orgasm Denial which both my Master and i do not feel is healthy. We have an agreement that i will never go longer than one month without having an orgasm. Usually i don't go any longer than a week or so at a time.
When i met my Master and He explained to me that O control was His kink - i looked far and wide for information on it and found only a couple of articles and nothing at all written by a submissive. That is what made me decide to write this article.
O control is something that i totally enjoy. I enjoy it so much that i have to admit that it is now MY kink! It began simply enough. Master asked me one day if i wanted to 'try something' for Him. i was at work and said 'yes Sir'. He asked me to go to the ladies room and stimulate myself to the point where i wanted to have an O - i was then to stop and not cum. When i got home in 4 hours i could go to the shower and bring myself to orgasm.
i shrugged and said sure. i did as He asked and the afternoon passed with some pleasant squirming and thoughts of the shower i had been promised. By the time i was driving home, i could think of nothing else. My body was on fire and as soon as i got in through the door i went right to the shower and had a wonderful orgasm.
"When can we do this again Master?" was my next question. Little did i know! A subbie should always be careful what he or she asks for! That night Master asked that i give Him my orgasms. By agreement i would not have an O without His permission. Being a new subbie and craving control as i did, i was happy to make that promise.
So from then on, when we played, Master would tell me 'not yet gina' and 'don't you dare cum gina'. Finally after much physical teasing, He would tell me to cum for Him. Although i have always been highly sexual and never had an issue with orgasms in the past i found that each orgasm i had using O control was the best i had ever had! i loved O control at that point!. Each session ended with my having an O and i was having more O's than ever before!
Even though i was 43 years old at that point, i learned about my body with my Master. He taught me not to think about the orgasm that i might not get but to enjoy the arousal. Prior to His training i had always been concentrating on the expected orgasm and not the feelings that came before the release. i am not sure i could have even told you before what those feelings were like. i was fixated on the release.
i was such a good student! Once i became comfortable with all that had been taught to me until this point, i was then assigned to do exercises every day where i would kneel and insert a light weight vibrator. This cannot be done with a heavy vibe! It was reinforced over and over again that the exercises were not for my pleasure - they are something i do for my Master.
i would then hold the vibrator which was turned on low at the beginning for short periods of time - beginning with just 5 minutes. i would squeeze my muscles around the vibe to hold it in. It was almost like doing kegels. Only harder.
i was not to cum during exercises! i was to stop before i got to that point. And then start again when i could. This was not to exceed one hour. Master was very clear with His expectations. Some days i could do it and other days i couldn't. never was i made to feel like a failed though. Master gave me lots of reassurances and praise during this time.
Once i was able to hold the vibrator for 5 minutes on low a few times in a row - Master increased the speed of the vibrator each time that i got to the point where i was successful for a few times in a row. Finally when the vibe was turned on high and i could hold it for 5 minutes; He brought it back to low and increased the time - building it back up again each time i reached success at one level. i do these every morning. It is one of our rituals.
At that point i was still allowed to touch whenever i wanted. Little did i know what a privilege this was! For about a month Master practiced physically stimulating me and then denying my O - until finally He let me cum. Each time He would let me cum but only after i had waited for longer and longer periods of time.
Then He began to do the physical stimulation and not let me cum! O control was not so much fun then! i was told i was no longer allowed to touch. My toys were off limits and the toybox kept locked. Master had begun to take control of my physical reactions to His teasing. He began to build trust that He would not push me past what i could physically handle. He watched me very closely during this time.
He then taught me to have small O's. i was to only allow my body to have a gentle release. i would tightly clench my muscles and try to hold back the orgasm. Over and over again He reinforced small O's with me. He could tell me to have a small O and i would be able to have just a gentle one or He could tell me to explode and i would - after physical stimulation.
This was practiced time and time again until He could control what intensity of orgasm my body had in reaction to the physical stimulation He provided. Again, each success was celebrated and each time it didn't work i was encouraged to try again and praised for all i gave to Him. i was never punished for a mistake.
i found was very hard not to touch. Even today not touching is the most difficult part of O control for me! We discussed this when i first realized how hard it was gong to be for me. i asked Master for His help and a punishment was agreed upon if this rule was broken.
Master would remind me daily of what my rules were and how He expected they would be followed. i found myself leaving showers, hurrying to change clothes, and being quite irritable. This only lasted for a short time though. For me it was the hardest period of O control training. For sure it was the most frustrating.
At this point Master and i discovered that i could respond to His voice. He began to 'talk' me up or down, sometimes using physical stimulation and other times just using His voice. This was a fun time for both of us as it was such an intimate sharing experience and i once again loved O control.
We spent a lot of time practicing up and down. "Up" meant that through physical stimulation i would be on the brink of an O and would hold it. "Down" would mean that i was on the brink of an O and i was to deny the feelings and bring myself back down off the edge of the orgasm. We moved from up and down through physical stimulation to up and down though voice control with no stimulation.
Then Master had a wicked thought. He decided if He could control the intensity of my orgasms He would also like to get me to cum but also tell me to stop in the middle. He used His most 'Domliest' voice to command me to stop. Master usually makes requests and is very polite. This was direct order time!
It worked and He could get me to stop in mid orgasm. i hated down and i hated stopping but i also loved the fact that He could do this with me. It is very important to point out at this point that this was something we were doing together, not something that Master did to me. For awhile when He would make me stop and i was successful, i was allowed to cum afterwards. Finally He moved to the point where He would tell me to stop mid-orgasm and i was not allowed to cum at all.
Next He would give me an assignment that had me going someplace nice and quiet. i had a favorite place where i would go and be alone by the side of a stream on my property but it could have been anywhere that i was comfortable. The point was that i was alone and not right there to hear His voice.
He would then have me practice going up for Him. And then come down. Or He would have me go somewhere and then go up and have an O - big or little as He desired. Then we decided together that my orgasms were for His pleasure and therefore i would only have them when we are together as He reinforced that my orgasm's were for His pleasure and not mine.
O control is not something you can rush through! It is something that is done slowly and built upon, one step at a time. At this point we had been working on it for about a year. Then one day Master told me to 'cum for Him'. No physical stimulation, no talking me up - just CUM. And do it now!!!!
It worked!. My body responded to His order. i was shocked. The orgasm was different from any i had had before. It came from inside me; not from anything that was being done to my body or my mind. He ordered and my body obeyed Him.
The first time it happened i was scared to death! It is very frightening to realize that someone has control of your body - even when you want them to. The fact that He could do that to me (or with me) made me stop and think really hard about what i was giving to Him and why.
This period took a lot of talking. Master spent a lot of time reassuring me and did not push His new ability. He gave me time to get used to the idea of this brand new control He had over me. After lots of talking and reassurances; i relaxed again and it was on to the next level.
Then came the day that we were in the middle of an argument. i was not too pleased with Him at that point. Suddenly He orders: "gina, cum for me now". My mind thought -"yeah right" and then i felt my body start to respond. i began to have an orgasm even though i was so angry at Him i did not want to have that reaction!
This really reinforced with me that it was His. i belonged to Him now - it really felt that way. Even when i was upset and not feeling the least bit horny; He could change that with one request. My body seems to hover on the edge of orgasm a lot now. Again He gave me time to get used to this idea before He moved on.
At this point, i went to my mentor with a fear. We had been working so long on O control and now Master could make me cum on command - would He now get bored with me? Was this the end? We had reached the big GOAL so what happens now? Both my mentor and my Master reassured me that this was just the beginning of our growth together and not an ending point.
And that was correct. Master and i are still learning and growing together. Only now we have something that no one else shares with us. Sure i can get stimulated from lots of things: pictures, a good hot story, touching, etc but only Master can make me cum on command.
From that point there has still be more to learn. When Master commands me to cum now i do - immediately. And i don't stop. The orgasms just keep coming. One after another. Even when it hurts. Until He tells me to stop. And while i am sure that i could take control and stop myself from cumming before i died from exhaustion - it doesn't feel that way.
The feeling of control is immense. For a subbie that is a joy like no other. i feel i truly belong to my Master now and have given Him a true gift. i hang on His every word; waiting for that command to cum for Him and then waiting for the one to stop. There is no other way to explain it.
O control is a behavioral modification. i have been taught that i am to react one way or another depending on His command. Time, patience, support and lots of love have brought my body to the point where Master can trigger the response that He wants from it. It was all done with positive reinforcement and very little punishment unless i deliberately broke the rules. And it was built up slowly and patiently.
i have heard many who have stated that O control is abusive and that it is a type of brain washing. i have heard that it changes the subbie in not so positive ways. While i can understand how this type of power might be abused - as any power might be - for me it has been a very pleasurable and rewarding experience.
i have not changed in any way other than in the way my body responds to my Master, in the intensity of my orgasms, in the level of control Master has over me and in my self confidence. Sharing something so intimate with my Master and being successful at it has given me a sense of pride as a subbie that i had not experienced before.
O control or release training is not for everyone. It is something to be tried and then used or discarded depending on the results that are forthcoming and the reactions that the Dom/me and sub are looking for. It is not worth breaking a relationship up over. It cannot be forced and for some people may not be possible to achieve.
O control is my kink. It is my kink because i find a peace and completeness in it that i have not found elsewhere. Emotionally i enjoy the control that my Master has over my mind and body. Physically i enjoy the best orgasms of my life. O control provides both myself and my Master with a lot of joy.
Anyone wishing to use this article on their site or mailing list may do so as long as my name (gina) and copyright which includes a link to Gina's House (http://groups.msn.com/GinasHouse2) remain on them. Please give credit where it belongs.
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