You Might Be Kinky If...
Author: luna
Filed in: humor, kinky, thoughtsYou might be kinky if you
remove sight by a blindfold.
Own a pair of handcuffs and use them.
Your version of 9 ½ weeks includes
whipped cream and chocolate sauce.
You have more leather than a cow has hide
and your favorite accessory to bed is 4” heels.
Mirrors are strategically placed
along the wall for optimum viewing.
Ambient lighting is not just candles,
but black lights, strobe lights and lava lamps.
You have more than one personal massager
hidden in your bedside table or
own or have rented pornography.
Your partner drips hot wax on your body
or your fantasies involve someone
accidentally discovering you like
to give light spanking, or get spanked.
You have done or witnessed a strip tease.
Your condoms come in multicolor,
glow-in-the-dark, ribbed, and spiral
and are sandwiched in your wallet
between ten dollar bills and a photo.
You can take art to the next level
with body paints and a human canvas.
You like to give or take orders in the bedroom
You have pretended to be the teacher
or naughty student and imagined
yourself as a nurse or patient needing “care”.
You have had ice cubes
dragged down your back
while withholding sex as punishment.
You have fantasies that involve
more than one person and had sex outdoors.
You just might be kinky.
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