Site Network: Submissive Guide | Submissive Journal Prompts | Dominant Guide | Kinky Blogging | My Blog |

Essay Collection

Hundreds of the most informative essays have been hand-picked for depth of knowledge and varied opinions with new and seasoned practitioners in mind. A wide range of topics are available for you to explore. Donations are always open so submit your essay to The Iron Gate for consideration!

Email to a Friend    Print Essay    Save to Computer

Top 10 Signs you are Too Old for BDSM

Author: Unknown

Filed in: humor



10. Sensory deprivation is when your Dom hides your hearing aid batteries.

9. Your nipple clamps have training wheels.

8. Edge play is standing by the microwave with a pacemaker.

7. When you tell your sub to get the cane, she has to specify "walking" or "beating".

6. You can't tell the difference between your tattoos and your age spots.

5. You shout "One, two, three, CLEAR!" for electrical play.

4. Your idea of breath play is when your wheelchair runs over your oxygen hose.

3. Your idea of suspension is an UltraLift bra.

2. You hold the paddle and say, "You're younger than me....back into the paddle ....HARD!"

And the Number One way to tell you might be too old for BDSM:

1. Age play really is 24/7.

Related Essays



Seeking Keyholders

Iron Gate Banner Exchange